full time female.: May 2011

Monday, May 30, 2011

hate the fact already!

Hi, i really wish you all a healthy life.

Last night, i have this supper with my boyfriend and that was when this conversation happened. He asked me about when i will start to move out my things from bandung to jakarta. I don't know, i've got to say. Why, he continued. Because it's just feel so sad to just think about it.

So, we went to our respective home.

I opened my room door, then my bathroom door, and there it was, a red beautiful rose my boyfriend gave me last wednesday. But it wasn't red anymore. I don't know why, but its kinda sad at that time, seeing the rose wilted.

The flowers, the music box, NUCKA, the brown book, it must be hard to see them all while he and i have to go through long distance period. Hate it already!

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

lady in red

The truth is i dont expect this much in my writing about the best friend thing. But, yaps, the thought keeps growing and growing, so well i’ll write another story about it.

Remember when i say that an on-off relationship is actually a pretty nice type of a friendship relationship? Well, think twice. Lets go deeper and switch our thought to the other side. It’s actually nice to do some fun with this kind of relationship, but some of my friends actually confess that they feel kind of lonely by this preference.

Everybody needs a deep relationship with somebody, it can be the neighbors, the colleagues, or the housemates. We can’t just build a fake relation with a fake-self of ours and a fake-self of our relateds. At first, it will be so damn good, but as our need of belonging to somebody grows, it will all gone wrong and boring. Plus, when you’re really need somebody to wipe your tears and to hug you in silence, trust me you’ll get confuse with whom the person who’s fit to be chased.

What i am going to say is just please respect whoever that is the person who treats you well and so treat them best. Cause it feels so nice when you know there’s somebody cares and loves you. Respect the friendship everybody offers and don’t just feel like you’re the princess. Maybe you are the little daddy’s princess, but you can do better than always act like a queen or a lady in red.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

curious with what comes ahead

Still about best friend.

I assume that you’ve read my previous writing about how hard I find a best friend, especially the girl. Here, I’ll tell you more about how this condition became harder, because that my few stocks were being seized by the matter of distance and time.

Me myself is in my final semester at college. Some of my friends had been graduated before me on last February, so I’ve gone through some goodbyes with them. It felt sad and now I felt sadder because of another goodbye that I must faced between me and my housemate named Stefani. We’re being so close since my middle year at college, it means two and a half years togetherness with her, every night and day. Oh, so hate goodbye! The thing is, when we got separated with our friends by the distance, it seems like our friendship as well go along with the departure of them. So hard to see that finally we’re not so close anymore with somebody who’s got to be our very best mate :(

I miss you all, Maria Stefani, Rani Tandiono, and Vina Andrimulya. This write is belong to you, girls, I love you. Lets keep our closeness *cheers

i miss having a bestfriend and do dance

A best friend is really hard to find for me. There are so many in common between a best friend and a boyfriend. I’ll give you the formula below:

Boyfriend – the touch, included the kiss and the hug things = Best Friend

Do you agree? It’s funny to finally realize that having a relationship as a friend is as hard as having a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. I think a best friend is also a soulmate just like the boyfriend or girlfriend. It’s so hard to meet the right guy for that both status. It’s not that I am too picky, oh come on, who doesn’t if the goal is for a long long-term relationship?

When you’re in junior or senior high school, everything about this topic is half way easier. I mean, who’s the girl who doesn’t have her soul sisters or sorority sisters for her own? I did have. We went to the mall and café, we did have the gossiping things all the time, we laugh, and we were fall in love to each other, more than our love to our boyfriend which usually so dumb at that time! We danced and we cried. But, when we go to the college and we get into our final year, everything step by step shifts into more individuality stuffs than the gang stuffs. Everybody starts to begin an on-off relationship. Many people as a college student do have many friends from this community and that community and many more communities to have fun, but somehow when they don’t need to do the fun but instead they need a shoulder to cry, none of those names and contacts on their blackberry are fit to be contacted. Why? Because the on-off relationship style doesn’t allow us to build a deeper relationship with a friend and add one special word in front of the word ‘friend’ that is the word ‘best’. So, we’re only stopping to anybody’s friend, not the best one.

When you start an on-off relationship, actually it’s a nice one. You can go with some friends from this community and do smiles and laughs and maybe a little mistake, but you know the little-but-hard-to-forget-in-the-near-of-time-kind-of-mistake. For example, when your friends pick you up, they have to wait for probably 20 to 30 minutes to have you ready and dress up, and maybe you get the lame surname as the Princess From Waiting or Snail Lady or something by your manner. Well, luckily when having the on-off relationship, you don’t have to meet up again with them at the near future. But instead, you can meet up with other friends of yours from another communities which practically do not know your super lame surname whatever that is, what a world right? And when you finally meet up with the first community I mention, yes they have forgot your princess wannabe manner and you save.

That’s why this friendship is pretty much like a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. Well maybe if there is this one girl who really match somehow someway with me and you, we don’t have to be afraid if she finds our badness. So, we can do dance, shop, gossip, and the cry all together again, just like the old times when we were in high school.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

NO-THING

I really feel like a writer recently, because every time i typed something on my laptop, it’s just seemed to be wrong so i completely destroyed it by pushing the bakspace or just directly ctrl+a then the delete button. You must ever see a movie with this scene quite often, right? The fact is just that i don’t sure about what topic i should write. It’s not that i have no thoughts in my mind, but it’s just won’t came out through my hands. I surely have this sad topic about the poor and difable people or the happy things about me seeing many many more nice people exist in this world or maybe only about how happy i am because finally my thesis got an acceptance and how all of my hard work is definitely worth it (well actually every hard work is always worthy), or yeah maybe i also can write about the hard work. There are plenty of them, but none on my paper. Or i definitely can go back to the classic one, the theme of love, or maybe about the God up there. Well well well, still no-thing on my paper unfortunately.

Maybe i just need to chat, with somebody new, somebody who don’t know much about me or who don’t know me at all. Don’t you think that’s exciting? That thing is gonna be so cool. I’d like to share my thoughts, my dreams, my stories, and see his reaction about it. It’s always nice, meeting a new people. Don’t you think?